A plan for marriage

Recently I published a short reflection on veiling for my daughter.  Much of which was focused on the biblical role of women especially in marriage. It seems unbalanced at least not to address the same passages from the prospective of men.

As a reminder we are talking about 1 Cor 11:2-16 Ephesians 5:21 1St Peter 3.

The world , especially in America is always sending us the message we should be submissive to no one.  However this is far from the model put forth for the family by the bible.  In fact I’d say it is so far that is comes from no other then the one who is the enemy of Christ.

The bible begins us with a model of mutual sacrifice, “Be subordinate to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Ephesians 5:1.

“likewise, you husbands should live with your wives in understanding, showing honor to the weaker female sex, since we are joint heirs of the gift of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.* 1St Peter 3.7

“Woman is not independent of man or man of woman in the Lord.g 12For just as woman came from man, so man is born of woman; but all things are from God.” 1 Corth 12.

So, no one should one take away from the scriptures, that even though women should be submissive to their husbands that this is meant to be slavish kind of submissiveness.  But rather it is obviously the submissive of equals each doing the part meant for them on a team.  However, women are not meant to be the captain. It is the part of men to be ‘greater’ in the life of the family, but to put this in a christian perspective we must always remember the words of Christ.

Sound good guys. Maybe you should think more deeply.  Christ had this to say to the grater.

But Jesus summoned them and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and the great ones make their authority over them felt. 26But it shall not be so among you. Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you shall be your servant; 27e whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave. 28f Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom* for many.”

Mathew 20:25

25* n He said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them and those in authority over them are addressed as ‘Benefactors’; 26but among you it shall not be so. Rather, let the greatest among you be as the youngest, and the leader as the servant”

Luke 22:25

So , we should begin by intuiting that the type of leadership that the authors of the letters intend for husbands is not exactly the type so often stressed or seen in this world.

Even more so Paul has this to say:”Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for hert 26to sanctify her, cleansing her by the bath of water with the word,u 27that he might present to himself the church in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.vEphesians 5:25

This is the real key! What did Christ do for his Church?  He loved Her, He loved her even though he knew her every flaw, even though he saw that at times she would waver in her commitment and her desire for him, regardless of any imperfection she had he loved Her.  He loved her literately to death. He gave up everything for her, He came down from his throne in heaven and was drug through the mud and spit at for her sake and finally nailed to a cross where the blood and sweat poured down until it “washed her of every blemish”.  Not to say that any man can save his wife, but Christ Can and will and he wishes to do so through using the husband in many cases.

However, the husband is OBLIGATED by christian duty to lay down his life, his power, his wants, his career, his dreams, his family of origin,  for her sake, for the sake of the family that comes through contact with her. He is called to use all his manly strength and power to “lay down his life for his friend”.  He must lay them all down remembering that “everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.”  Make no mistake, if marriage is to be holy and according to the biblical model and it is a call to be like Christ , to participate in his saving mission, and that requires Crucifixion.

How many families are damaged, and love stopped up or even out right destroyed because the man has refused to lay down football, drinking, lust , work, glory, or the praise of others.

The wholeness of a family that reflects the love of the trinity can only be brought in place by a holy man striving to be like Christ , and much of the evil and sin we see in this world today is because we lack such men, who willingly and masculine commit to leadership in their families.  To doing the hard thing, with love, and compassion, and strength.  Can you Rise to the call husbands of the world?!!

Women cannot accomplish this, they weren’t meant too, and if they attempt to take headship in the family the will only be thwarted by the vary nature of who they are.

It is not a difficult plan, it is not complicated, but it is hard.  However, this is the type of hard ,men were made for, and if you are called to marriage, it is the type of hard that will bring fulfillment in your soul.  This is the battle in the modern world, this is the fight worth every bit of your fight and strength.  The fight for the soul of the family and the protection of those who you love.


Useful links:
Strong hands by Santus Real





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